So, around this time of year I start hitting fatigue with work.  My busy wedding season heads straight into an even busier fall season, with holiday photos and other family portraits.  It’s so easy for me to fall into a “woe is me” attitude about being busy, and stressed out, and stretched thin.  But you know what?  ENOUGH of that.  You know what?  I am so.damn.grateful.  And that is where my focus should be.

I have lived this dream of owning my own business making art for the past NINE year.  NINE!  I would have never guessed such a thing would be possible.  Just me, in my office or in a field or at your wedding with my camera.  But it’s worked, and I am so.damn.grateful.

Ben and I will often snap photos of each other working at weddings (the only thing we shoot together) and I keep them all in a file called “at work”.  Clever, huh?  Right now that file has 153 images in it.  Some are old, some are from our wedding last weekend.  My clients never see them.  They’re just for us, to remind us of what it’s like to work together.  I love looking at them because they remind me of  how worth it the whole thing is.  I get to do this.  For a living.  All the time.

It’s not always roses.  I DO get burnt out.  And I DO sometimes want to give it all up.  In fact, earlier this year I took a 3 month sabbatical to focus on Henry and some stuff he was going through, and I loved it.  I loved the time off.  I loved actually making dinner every night and having my weekends free and not being burnt out or busy.  But when the sabbatical ended I was rejuvenated and excited.

My clients will tell you what a dork I am when I shoot.  I FREAK OUT when I get the shot.  The goosebump shot, or the one that makes me cry behind my camera, or the one where I really found the perfect light.  And that’s me.  Loving my job, even though it makes me insane sometimes, and even though it’s hard to explain to Henry that my job isn’t like Dada’s.  I don’t work a 9-5.  I work evenings and weekends and weekdays, too.  I might have 1 day off a month, but I am also fortunate to have flexibility to be there every single day to pick him up from school.  I try to help him understand how great that is.  He’ll get it, some day.

Also, if you must know, we generally leave weddings feeling a little like this.  A heart full of love but a body ready for sleep:

But the humorous moments like these help the fatigue:

And I live for these moments:

So, to you, my clients, I dedicate this quote with a heart full of gratitude and thanks:

“When buying from an artist/maker, you’re buying more than just an object/photograph.

You are buying hundreds of hours of failures and experiments.

You are buying days, weeks & months of frustration and moments of pure joy.

You aren’t just buying a thing.

You’re buying a piece of a heart, part of a soul, a moment of someone’s life.

Most importantly, you’re buying the artist more time to do something they are passionate about.”

– Anonymous